a prayerful quandary

Ok I was told a few weeks ago to let many things go. one of them being the pain caused by my dad

I was working yesterday and I was stocking the men's shaving products and stumbled upon some Gillette shave gel. I decided I wanted to know what it smelled like to see if its something David may want.

it smelled like my dad.

now he has had a beard my entire life so I don't think he's ever used Gillette shaving gel on a regular basis, it must of been something else of that brand that he used. deodorant maybe.

i guess it doesn't really matter.

in the middle of work though it sent my brain reeling. back to 3 Wednesdays ago when I was told to let go.

my question is this. what is that supposed to look like?

am I supposed to let go of my desire for reconciliation? or am I supposed to reconcile in order to let go?

a prayerful quandary indeed.