my family.
I never know how to appropriately paint the picture of my family. yes they are dysfunctional, but I love them. how to paint them in such a light that their craziness and their love come through in equal parts?
I went to dinner tonight with a couple from my church. I am friends with their daughter and only casually know them. the wife gave me a ride home today from the women's retreat and knew that my husband had gone out of town.
so fast forward to about 7:00 I get a call from a number I don't recognize but its a San Francisco area code and this fact indicates they know me. since I don't have a local area code I don't get wrong numbers a whole lot.
I say yes and they say ok, we'll be there in 2 minutes. I rush because as soon as I had gotten home I had promptly put on my PJ's.
we go to a Filipino food restaurant a few blocks from my house that I've never been brave enough to try. I've wanted to but I'm a firm believer that when you try something new you have to go with someone that knows what to order and whats good. they've been there, and are Filipino so this is a perfect opportunity. (by the way the food was delicious, so good. so good. Filipino food where have you been my whole life?)
well naturally since we don't know each other that well we talk about where I'm from etc etc. the topic of families turns up since David is visiting his and they ask about mine. I say where everyone lives etc etc and that I have a pretty small family. my mom and her crazy boyfriend working in Kuwait. and then they ask what about your dad? oh yeah,my dad that wont speak to me. and I cant talk about that really without talking about the why . and the why is hard to explain cuz its hard understand for even me and I lived it.
how do i explain this and not look pathetic? I'm that girl with that family, the flaky crazy ones. Its always hard and awkward for me. so I just don't talk about it really. I'm getting better though, because no matter what, that family is part of who I am and how I got here and not talking about it leaves a big gaping hole in the story of who I am.
the food and company was fabulous though and i think i was able to successfully navigate the new situation pretty well. this is hard for me because of my shyness no one knows exists. and it was so sweet they didn't want me eating dinner alone.they remind me a little of my in-laws. so genuine and generous and just good people. and did i mention I love Filipino food?
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2 comments:
1. Good job on stepping out into new situations!
2. I'm proud of you for accepting the craziness of your family and not hiding it.
3. Remember, though, that your family is not your identity. The only "that girl' you are is THAT girl who deeply loves, and is deeply loved by, her Lord and Savior. That's where your identity comes from. Not your family. People don't judge others by their family as often as we think they do. And Christians try not to judge period. So I think you're safe. :) Love ya!
What a lovely gesture from people you hardly know!!!
(I like Filipino food, too! So tasty!)
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